Thursday, February 20, 2014

Beauty Busts, Episode One

I have a bit of an obsessive personality, especially when it comes to purchases.  I will research a topic or product to DEATH before I buy it.  I'll spend days, weeks, even MONTHS reading every single review on the internet before handing over my hard earned cash -- for small purchases and large purchases alike.  Usually, my time and energy pays off and I end up thrilled with my purchases. However, occasionally there's a fluke and I end up with something terrible.  Nothing is worse than a lackluster beauty purchase. 

 I get passionate over my beauty products, so I'm making it my mission to save you from the heartaches that I've endured (I know, I know -- dramatic, much?).  I've got so many that this will have to be a multi-part post, so let's go ahead and get started!

Okay, is there anyone that actually likes this stuff? No? Just PR girls who pay its way onto every "Best Of" List in the beautysphere? The formula sucks, the brush sucks. Hello, Tammy Faye Baker lashes.
Maybelline, stop trying to make fetch happen.  It's not gonna happen.

Truthfully (hehe)? This stuff isn't terrible.  It didn't make me break out and it didn't ruin my skin forever.  In fact, it's got some really great ingredients - Vitamin C and Vitamin E, both of which my skin loves.  However, the concentration of Vitamin C is so low that results would be almost nonexistent.  Plus, the texture left a lot to be desired - it goes on easily, but dries into a plastic-like film that sits on top of the skin.  My main issue is that they charge an arm and a leg ($60 for 1 ounce - OUCH), and the amount of Vitamin C is too low for anyone to see significant results.   It would be like buying a pricey bottle of wine that had 1/4 cup of wine diluted by 4 cups of water.  You're not going to feel relaxed after drinking a glass of that mess, are you? This is also a product that makes it on a lot of "best of" list, but you're better off spending your money elsewhere.  I actually make my own Vitamin C serum at home for WAY less than a quarter of the price and it's a million times more effective.  Plus I get to feel like a mad scientist, so that's cool.

Man.  I really had high hopes for this stuff. I love (l-o-v-e, LOVE) using coconut oil as a hair treatment, so I assumed this shampoo would be hydrating and leave my hair soft and silky.  I know what my father always said about assuming.... it makes an "ass" out of yo"u" and "me"...and my hair.  I'm not sure if it was the overwhelming amount of proteins in the shampoo or what, but it made my hair feel like straw.  It was almost like it left a gross coating on each strand of hair.  Heck, I wouldn't even use it on my dog.  It does smell nice though, in case you're into straw-like hair that smells good.  I picked it up on a whim at Target without reading any reviews, so this pretty much my own fault.

I'm calling you out again, Maybelline.  The Color Whisper line is Maybelline's take on the balm lipstick trend (YSL Sheer Candy, Revlon Lip Butter, etc).  This color has great reviews, so I picked it up.  The color was pale, frosty, and dried my lips out a lot.  Have you every seen dry lips with a frosty lip product?  ICK, ICK, DOUBLE ICK.  I sampled it in the parking lot, then promptly threw it away. Life's too short for dry lips.  Every once in a while, the reviews get it wrong, and this was just one of those times. I recently tried L'Oreals version (Colour Riche Balm in "Rose Elixir", also gets great reviews) and it is awesome! 

I know, I know.  I'm just begging for an onslaught of hate mail.  But seriously, I don't get the hype.  Their matte shadows are actually okay -- I've used them and they are smooth and pigmented.  But seriously, UD only has one matte shadow per 800 glitter shadows, so they're the outliers.  In general UD eyeshadows are either glitter bombs or super frosty.  I prefer for my makeup to "glow" rather than "sparkle" or "shine", so they just aren't for me.  I've tried to like them, I really have.  But it's just not happening. Sorry.
Don't tie any Naked palettes onto bricks and throw them through my window okay?

What are your some your beauty busts? Do share!


  1. haha I love me a good product review. But what are some products you like?! :)

  2. Ha ha ha I love your product reviews, quite funny! I must agree with you on the Coconut shampoo and Great Lash mascara. The shampoo made my hair so staticky that I looked like a pom pom. As for the mascara, I saw it on the "Best Of" list and after trying it thought the same thing you did, that someone paid big money to get this product on that list.

  3. Yes, I totally agree...well, 80%. You lost me at UD shadows; but I promise no brick throwing! Ha! ;-)
    I seriously hated the color whispers, and the mascara. It left my lashes wet for at least 10 minutes. Gross!
    I'm so glad you reviewed that shampoo!! I almost bought it at Target a few days ago, and didn't because I had other shampoo to finish first.
    XO - Samantha

  4. I'm so happy to hear that I'm not the only person who spends hours and hours and days and weeks researching products!! I do it for everything. I agree about the great lash and I once tried the organix moroccan oil shampoo and it was awful and left my hair a grease ball.

  5. Looks like Maybelline is not on any of your must buy lists!! As for shampoos - that is a real downer because there is nothing quite like getting a new bottle and using it for the first time!!

  6. Totally agree with you on the coconut shampoo - no thank you!!!

  7. i did not like that mascara at all . Great post dear !! would you like to follow each other on GFC and on bloglovin :) xx

  8. Haha... this post had me cracking up!

  9. I wish I did research before I bought stuff. And your reviews had me laughing - lol!

    Clothes & Quotes

  10. I never got the hype about Maybelline Great Lash either-- my go-to drugstore mascara is L'Oreal's Voluminous. While I haven't tried Organix's Coconut Milk shampoo, I do like the leave-in mist in the same line-- smells SO good! Love the post!

  11. I love this post and love your blog! I am a new follower and can't wait to read more!

  12. Okay I have a few comments - I totally agree on Great Lash. I tried it in maybe 9th grade and have never bought it again, even though I think about it all of the time because I want to be one of those "cool girls" who uses the original. And then I remember this one girl in high school who had puffy eyelids and five straight eyelashes and know I will look like that if I buy it again.

    We talk EVERY SINGLE DAY and I don't know you make your own serum? Dude. You betters be having some for me to try on Thursday along with the recipe. Thank ya very much.

    Everything from Organix must be like that. I tried the Moroccan Oil shampoo and conditioner and got the same coating (yet still static?) results.

    Finally, while I agree with you on most Urban Decay eyeshadows, the shimmery nude I use as my base eyeshadow is an Urban Decay and it's pretty good. BUT, if it makes me look like a 15 year old girl, please feel free to let me know when you see me.

    Awesome reviews girl!

  13. hahah fetch. glad you brought that one back.

    and im on the Urban outfitters bus... i have two shaddows that i love and cant give up. but i promise they arent toooo sparkly! xo jillian - cornflake dreams